Grace and Peace to you from God, our father and the Lord Jesus Christ. Amen.
When I lived in Liberia in coastal West Africa, I was often shocked at how different peoples’ attitudes were. Until just a hundred years ago or so, much of Africa was a polygamous culture – men could have as many wives as they could afford. Well, as you can imagine, living in a household where there is one dad and four moms can be extremely confusing. You have brothers and sisters, half brothers and sisters there is rivalry between the wives and their children that often borders on hatred.
Even though presently, Africans are moving toward a monogamous culture, the old style polygamous family systems have their impact. Adultery, or having a “side squeeze” is very common and they have strict rules for what to do to make things right when infidelity happens. For instance, my neighbor where I lived in Kakata was something of a Romeo. His wife was constantly taking him to court for his affairs. In Liberia, adultery was a misdemeanor because the society there considered it an offense against the public order. When found guilty, my neighbor had to pay a fine of $35 plus court costs. Thirty five dollars may not seem like much but to a Liberian making $350 a year it was one tenth of his income. Infidelity was a pretty pricey dalliance in Liberia.
Today’s lesson from 1 Corinthians talks about sexual purity, and implied herein is the same basic wisdom that my Liberians friends acted on. Infidelity is not simply a private matter it is everybody’s business. Unchastely leads to a weakening of the fibers that are the basis of the very social culture that supports all of us. Communities need stability. Children need to be raised in secure predictable worlds where there is a Mom and Dad to love them and to see to their welfare. The family unit is basic and essential to any society and sexual purity is the central adhesive or glue that holds couples together.
Paul in 1 Corinthians is preaching in a pagan context. Corinth was kind of like the Las Vegas of the ancient Roman world. It was a seaport town and like any sailor’s port “if you wanted it, they had it in Corinth”. Living in such a promiscuous environment, people naturally were affected by it. We are social creatures and we look around us to see what other people are doing. If a form of behavior is accepted by the vast majority of people, it gains acceptance as a cultural norm: Desperate Housewives is one of the most popular drama in America. Paul was trying to persuade the Corinthians that in spite of what they saw going on around them, God hadn’t made humans sexual for this purpose. Christians are in the world, but they are not of the world. Some groups of Christians have taken this to an extreme and have set themselves apart by their mode and manner of dress that reflect their separateness, Pilgrims, Quakers, the Amish all have said the world “we are really citizens of another realm and our first loyalties are to God”.
Perhaps that’s not such a bad idea – a bit far fetched but not bad. Imagine how you’d be treated if you went to work or to a soccer game wearing a clerical collar like I do – believe me, people would treat you differently. (You’d probably watch your P’s and Q’s more too).
St. Paul is talking in our lesson about the communal consequences of our individual behavior. People were shocked when President Clinton had a casual affair. He certainly wasn’t the first President to do so, but it caused great harm. Important people are role models and help set standards. What they do impacts the behavior of others. Paul was saying to the Christian community in Corinth – “It doesn’t matter what your neighbors do sexually. It matter what you do. Do not behave promiscuously because you speak and act for Christ because you are a part of Christ’s body. If people see you out in brothels it will weaken us as a Spiritual community. In other words Paul is saying, “Your words and your deeds must be in harmony. You can’t just talk the talk you have to walk the walk”. He is speaking about the relationship between our personal and our communal integrity.
It is hard to maintain a spirit of modesty and to be chaste in our present cultural climate. Forty years ago, Lucy and Desi slept in twin beds because the producers of the show were reluctant to even suggest that they were intimate with one another. I’d say that was a bit crazy and going overboard, but a quick look at even network TV, not to mention cable shows how far we have come in fifty years. It is hard to teach children to value chastity in today’s’ social climate.
Yet, God’s truth is timeless. If we treat fine china like paper plates, we will continuously abuse what God deems to be fine and precious.
How do we live in such a way as to honor God’s commands? In the Small Catechism Luther talks about marriage, faithfulness and remaining chaste. He says in his explanation to the 6th commandment – “Thou shalt not commit adultery”. These words “We are to fear and love God so that in matters of sex our words and conduct are pure and honorable and husbands and wives love and respect each other”. It’s simple straightforward advice; express your sexualness only with one other person to whom you have pledged a life long commitment. In that commitment have all the fun you want but be sure that your actions express mutuality, tenderness… your very basic” do unto others as you would have them do unto you” ways of relating.
How do we teach that to our children? There is a tendency among us to want to monitor everything that our children see and hear. That is appropriate when they are little but as they reach adolescents and become adults we have to teach, guide, direct and persuade them to adopt God’s value system.
Christian practices are not only commanded of us by God but because God orders them they are best for us. We need to teach our children that their bodies and the gift of sexuality are beautiful precious gifts, but they are always to be treated like fine china – never paper plates. God loves bodies so much, he gave one to Jesus. God also promises to resurrect us in a body so that we can love and touch each other externally.
So, how do we teach valuing chastity?
At our house we don’t restrict what our teens can watch. However, when Road Rules comes on or the OC, or Desperate Housewives we talk about it with the kids. We explain as best we can the difference between what the “world” says, does and believes and what Jesus who is the Way, the Truth and the Life says to us, always keeping in mind that we aren’t going to be able to crawl into their pockets and prevent them form making a mistake.
When we break a peace of china we can glue it back together. Professional repair shops can do such a good job of repair that you can hardly tell the difference. Sin is forgiven by God in Christ and we are remade whole too. But isn’t china more beautiful when it is not marred?
Today’s’ lesson from Corinthians reminds us to be careful with the beautiful “china” the beautiful bodies God has given us. St. Paul asks us to steward them wisely, throughout life, always mindful that these precious selves we call our own really belong to God and it is God through Christ who has paid the ultimate price to show us how worthwhile, how loved, how treasured we really are.
In Jesus’ Name, Amen.
Who We Are